


In the Hands of the Stars

by Crystallinee



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, bellow diamond - Freeform, comforting the wife
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-25
Updated: 2018-07-25
Packaged: 2019-06-16 05:41:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15430209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crystallinee/pseuds/Crystallinee
Summary: When Blue is lost in her grief, only Yellow Diamond can save her.Written for Bellow Diamond Week 2018, Day 1: Reunited.





	In the Hands of the Stars

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place after Pink's disappearance.

She moves slowly, struggling to push herself from the floor.

Blue Diamond clenches her fist once, before all the strength runs from her like water and she lowers her head, hiding her form and face behind her veil. It's her protection against the world: she never has to look anyone in the face anymore. She can turn away; letting the flowing material encase her in a bubble. _If only_.

She can't recall how much time has passed since she sank to the floor and stopped moving. Maybe millennia has gone by; she can't make sense of the time, nor how many cycles have passed since she last checked in with the other Diamonds or her court. Only Blue Pearl stands there by the wall, ready to assist her should she utter a word.

There is no grave to visit, nothing to speak to, only the emptiness hollowing her out from the inside. She feels the craving for energy, some kind of nourishment, despite always being energized by her gem. With her forehead against the floor she eventually looks up, shielding her hair and face from view. Blue Pearl takes a swift bow when she notices her movement.

"Pearl…" The words feels so heavy. "I want to speak to Yellow."

"Yes, My Diamond."

Pearl silently complies, turning on the bright communicator. A holographic screen flashes to life.

"So you finally picked yourself up from the floor," Yellow remarks, but her voice is too cutting and bright; it doesn't fool Blue. She notices the signs of relief in the other gem's face, she knows she's been missed. A small part of her feels guilty, knowing how hard the other Diamond works for the both of them. Seeing her face after all this time, no matter how long it's been, feels soothing.

She craves the physical touch, a reminder that she's not all alone in the universe, having someone to lean on. Yellow hasn't had the time to visit her for ages.

"I can't go on like this," she mumbles.

"What do you want me to do about it? You need to get on with your colonization and be a leader. It's the only thing we can do." Yellow's voice is unusually strict; she never spoke to Blue that way before, like she does to her subordinates. A sinking feels settles in Blue.

She turns away. "It doesn't matter, Yellow. It doesn't matter anymore."

"It's the only thing that matters!" her fellow Diamond explodes from the other side of the screen. "Pull yourself together, Blue! It's been a thousand years!"

Heavy tears cascade down Blue's face, at the tone of voice Yellow used, caused by the realization and her words. Her eyes moves to the heavy pillars in the room of the moon base.

There is no end to the agony, no refuge or break from the thoughts – the cycles and sunrises and planetary movements around her are like one single day without end. There is no escape but work and she cannot get herself to move. She grits her teeth, wishes desperately to spend a while, just a little while inside her gem, resting from the feeling tearing her apart.

She knows she can't do it herself, and even if she asked – ordered – Blue Pearl to destroy her form, ensuring her Pearl's own destruction, she could never end it completely for her. Only White or Yellow could.

The feeling is so raw it feels like her gem has already shattered.

_She was so small. So young. So inexperienced –_

_and now she rests in the hands of the Stars, forever loved and remembered._

"Goodbye, Yellow," she says hollowly, and only sees Yellow's confused and upset face before she orders her Pearl to turn off the communicator.

Blue remains completely still, gazing at one of the pillars supporting the roof before she reaches out and breaks it off like a stick in her hand.

It's useless. It cannot even scratch her.

Only a _sword_ – in the corner of her vision she sees her Pearl crumble to the floor under the weight of her emotion – only _Rose Quartz' sword_ could damage a Diamond.

There is no way out, no weapon around that could destroy her form, and it chews away at her. "Pearl," she says slowly, not looking at her. "Give me a sword."

"M-my Diamond?" Blue Pearl's voice is trembling.

"Give. me. a. sword."

She thinks of her little Pink's shattered remains in her hands and she starts trembling, falling back onto the floor like a broken statue. _Yellow, I need you._

The tears covers her face completely and Blue Pearl struggles to remain upright as she whispers, choked: "Yes, My… Diamond."

She knows Yellow was all wrapped up in the retaliation and attack, but even if Rose Quartz is broken into million pieces, it won't be enough. Nothing will ever bring her little Pink back. She looks at her empty hand in front of her as her vision blurs, seeing it tremble, and remember Pink sitting in it when she was new and small.

They had all been so excited when Pink finally emerged from the ground. So new and unknowing about what she was supposed to be, and they had seen her grow and change. She had a temper, but she always knew what she wanted.

A small movement alerts her to Pearl, who has conjured a small, sharp blade from her gem. She hands it over with outreached hands, kneeling, and Blue receives it. The sword is small enough to fit in her palm and she sinks further down; this is useless. She clenches her hand around it and closes her eyes.

"My Diamond," Blue Pearl whispers, crying as she holds on to Blue's cloak, "Please let me put Yellow Diamond on the communicator."

Blue simply turns and stares at the ceiling, seeing stars gleam faintly through the transparent material. "What's … the use of it?"

She looks up, wishes for the time to pass, looking for the strength to do it. Eventually the heavy silence is shattered. Steps approaching doesn't faze her, and she simply lets go of the sword.

"Blue!" The voice is sharp… and _scared_.

She recognizes those hurried steps, and then: "Blue - " It ends in a short, sudden breath, and she opens her eyes in confusion.

Yellow stands in front of her, anger building in her face at the sight of the sword, her usually so composed voice sounds like it's about to fall apart. "What are you _doing_? What's the meaning of this?"

Blue sits up, and the corners of Yellows eyes start watering up as they stare at each other. Time passes, it could be another millennia or just a few seconds, even the asteroids outside seem to have frozen in place.

Then, Yellow's knees hit the floor of their own accord. She reaches out in one sudden movement and grabs Blue's hands, leaning close until they're face to face.

Blue looks silently at her as Yellow's shoulders starts to shake, unaffected by anyone's emotions but her own. She grits her teeth.

"How could you even _think_ about leaving me, Blue?"

She sounds so broken that Blue instinctively reaches forward, and presses herself to the other Diamond. Yellow is still shaking in her embrace and Blue lets a hand settle on top of the other's gem, crying together with her as she realizes what she was about to do in her madness.

"I'm sorry."

"I won't let you share the same fate – what I let happen to Pink -" The words are nearing hysteria, cracking at the seams, and Blue grasps her hands as she speaks. "It was not your fault."

Yellow presses her forehead to hers, grasping her.

"Just stay with me for a while," Blue mumbles, and presses her lips to the side of her face. The other gem relaxes ever so slightly.

They remain like that, frozen in each others' embraces. Yellow leans her head on her shoulder, and Blue feels her own tears slowly dry up, for the time being.

They're together again, and even if it's just for this moment, it's a little easier to exist.

 

 

_Fin._

**Author's Note:**

> Comments are welcome!


End file.
